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Dating Spot


Dating is a process that gives one enough time to find out as much as possible about a person. But without the right dating spot, you’ll probably end up far from what you dreamt the date would be like. Great food in the nicest restaurant is one ideal way to spend a romantic evening. When choosing a restaurant for your date, remember you are looking for romance, excitement and passion.

Find the perfect place to feed your appetite for romance, great cuisine and add up to time well-spent. But be sure to check out a place that has just the right romantic ambience to leave your sweet talk undisturbed with a delightful mix of fine dining, low lighting and some smooth music to spice things up a bit. Be assured searching the right restaurant (if that’s your dating spot) is no more a problem.

Get to know the preferences and the favorite dishes of your date. Giving an added thought to research the preferences will go a long way towards winning your date’s affections. You know it would be a bad idea to treat your special someone a Mexican delicacy, while it’s the sushi that he/she drools for. Always choose food that’s easy to eat and avoid struggling with lobsters - never forget you are on a date and not out there to explore delicacies.

But how do you come up with the perfect restaurant – that offers good service, good food, perfect ambience, great memories and lots of romance? Search online for great listings of romantic restaurants. Restaurant search engines like BooRah are one such web space that aggregates millions of online reviews and transforms them into easily understandable summaries and in-depth ratings that enables consumers to see all restaurant recommendations and information in one place – easily connecting people to the restaurants they most desire and helping them discover romantic places to try.

Search for restaurants that are not crowded or have plenty of distractions, it’s got to be a quiet place. Of course, a candle-lit dinner has always been romantic. If you both are into dancing, choose a restaurant that has a dance floor with a live band that plays soft music, classy tunes and romantic melodies. Prefer soft music as it gives scope to whisper the sweet nothings in each other’s ears.

To make your date a memorable one, choosing the right place is a step ahead in the direction of making it a romantic evening. Use a restaurant guide to pick out a place that best suits your temperament and reflects you true self. Never pretend to like a Sushi restaurant, just because your date does. Discover your love with great food in the perfect ambiance.

By ajax z
Published: 4/5/2008

Eight Great Dating Tips

For Men

If you keep these seven dating tips for men in mind, you’ll be successful in dating as many, or as few, women as you want to. And if you continue to follow them, you’re much more likely to win the woman of your dreams.
Dating tips for men wouldn’t seem like something you have to read about in an article; after all, you can ask your buddies for their advice, right? But perhaps that’s why so many of your buddies are still single. These days it seems like the rules of dating have become so complicated that the basics have been forgotten. To make it a little bit easier, here are some basic dating tips for men that are guaranteed to make things easier – and they’re back to basics rules that every woman will appreciate.

Make Eye Contact

So many men today forget that conversation isn’t just about words. Women put a high value on communication that goes beyond words, and if you focus on impressing, talking and showing yourself in the best light, you may not be focusing on her. Eye contact assures her that she has your undivided attention – something every woman wants on a date. It reassures her that the night is about her and her alone.

Remember to Ask Questions and Listen to Her Answers

Yes, you want her to get to know you. You’ll have plenty of opportunity to let her get to know you if you get to know her on those first few dates. You should certainly answer her questions and give input to the conversation, but make sure you ask her about what she likes and what she’s interested in. Don’t forget to get her opinion rather than just giving yours – and if you disagree on a particular subject, that’s fine. Debating an interesting topic in a relaxed manner will show you’re intelligent and that you respect her opinion. For Pete’s sake, don’t insist on changing her mind – respect her independence.

Be Yourself

This sounds so simplistic, but I’m astounded by the number of men who try show off how successful and important they are by inflating their job titles, salary, etc. early on in a relationship. Do you really want to get caught in this type of charade weeks or even months down the line? If she’s really the one for you, she’ll respect what you do and who you are. Far better to find out now than later. Especially if you really have it for the girl later, and she dumps you for being deceitful. If you remember any dating tips for men, this is the absolute most important.

Flowers on the First Date?

Save the flowers and grand gestures for after the first few dates. This is one of those dating tips for men that may come as a shock to a lot of you, but flowers on the very first date isn’t nearly as impressive as flowers or some other gift a few dates down the line. On the first date, a woman will assume you bring flowers to every first date, so it’s a relatively empty gesture. Gallant, but not triggered by your feelings for her. On your third or fourth date, she’ll be wowed by a small gift or bouquet. Why? Because you’ve taken the time and thought to bring her something after you’ve already known she’ll go out with you. It means the gesture is heart-felt – it’s all about the way she makes you feel.

Keep it Casual

Another dating tip for a single man that’s often overlooked is to keep it casual. You don’t have to make the first date the most impressive and romantic in the world. After all, it’s difficult to go up if you start at the top – what will you do for an encore on an anniversary or special occasion? Instead, go out for coffee or drinks on the first date. If you definitely want it to be dinner, suggest someplace nice but casual, not the Ritz. You’ll both be more comfortable when you aren’t worrying about which fork to use or how to address the wine steward. Choose a place that’s comfortable and not too loud so that you can linger and talk as long as you’d like.

Should You Talk about Work?

Avoid talking about work too much. Always remember this dating tip for men: Naturally a woman wants to know what you do, and you should give her a brief sketch. But until you know a woman really well, don’t give a long dissertation on the last deal you landed. You’ll either sound like you’re bragging or she’ll think you’re obsessed with your job. Neither image is appealing.

Show Up on Time

Don’t ever, ever keep a woman waiting on you – it doesn’t build anticipation. It makes you appear inconsiderate and self-centered. If something happens and you can’t avoid running late, be sure to call ahead and apologize and let her know so that she isn’t sitting at home stewing.

Call When You Say You Will

(Here’s an online dating tip for men: The same applies to logging on – if you have plans to "meet" by Instant Message – be there.) No woman ever wants to feel like she was humored and then brushed off. If you say you will call next week, call next week. Not the week after, or the next month. When you do that, it screams, "I was keeping you on the back burner just in case nothing better came along." If you aren’t interested in another date, don’t promise anything. Simply say, "I had a nice time. Good night." Promising something you have no intention of following through on is guaranteed to hit the female grapevine, and your name will be Mudd.

If you keep these seven dating tips for men in mind, you’ll be successful in dating as many, or as few, women as you want to. And if you continue to follow them, you’re much more likely to win the woman of your dreams.

About the Author:

Kevin Urban is the editor at Dating-Site-Advisor.com, a popular consumer guide to the best online dating sites. He offers detailed reviews on free online dating services and gives free dating advice for single men.

Copyright 2006 Dating-Site-Advisor.com

By Kevin Urban
Published: 6/22/2006

Single Parent Dating Tips

– How to Date with Kids

Relax and enjoy dating again! These single parent dating tips won’t guarantee completely smooth sailing, but it will make the process less confusing for everyone concerned.
Single parent dating tips have to address issues that people without children don’t ever have to worry about. Let’s face it – being a single parent is pretty difficult at times to begin with. Throw trying to establish a special adult relationship into the mix and you’ve got lots of complications. I’ve put together some single parent dating tips that can help simplify things so that you can relax and enjoy dating again.

Explaining it to Your Kids

When you are going out on a date, let your kids know that you’re going out with a friend. It’s a simple, honest explanation. Especially with younger kids, no more details are needed; if they ask who the friend is, simply say that it is someone from work, a friend of your neighbor, or whoever it is. Don’t try to explain too much – simpler is better.

Avoiding Resentment

Don’t introduce your children to someone you’re dating until you’re pretty sure the relationship is going somewhere. Meeting several different people over time will only confuse them, and they may come to resent your dating anyone at all.

Introduce Your New Friend Slowly

Once you’re ready to introduce your significant other to your children, do so slowly. The first time, it should be simply ice cream or perhaps some time in the park. Gradually allow more time with the kids and include them on some appropriate "family dates."

Your Children Come First

Here is a very important single parent dating tip: make it clear from the beginning that your children will come first in any situation. If this seems to be a problem for anyone you’re seeing, it’s time to stop the relationship. Any man or woman who is jealous of your children isn’t a good bet for a relationship.

Your Commitments Come First

If you’re a single parent who only sees his children every other weekend or a similar schedule, make this clear. Tell someone you are dating that you won’t be available on those weekends, and stick to it until you’re ready to have everyone get together. This reassures your children and gives the person you’re dating an idea of the commitment involved in dating someone with children.

Don’t Move Too Quickly

If you allow your kids to get close to someone early on, only to break up with them a few months later, they will end up hurt and confused. This is especially essential if you’re just starting to date again or if you’ve recently divorced.

Listen to Your Kids

Once your children have met someone you’re dating, listen to their input. (A dating tip I got from a lot of single parents). This doesn’t mean nixing your social life if your son or daughter says, "I don’t want you to date anymore," without a good explanation. However, if he or she says they really don’t like him because he yells at them, doesn’t pay attention to them or just makes them uncomfortable, listen. Discuss the concerns with your companion, watch how he or she interacts with your children and put some real thought into the situation.

Don’t Parade Your Date in Front of an Ex

It may be tempting to let your ex know that you’ve moved on, but it’s unfair to use a date as a weapon. Your children will no doubt mention that you’re dating when they are with their other parent, and that’s fine. Don’t ask them to keep it a secret or they will feel like you are doing something wrong. Simply let things take their course, and answer their questions honestly.

Reassure Your Children

Reassure your children that dating someone is completely separate from your love for them. Explain the importance of having a special adult in your life, but that it doesn’t diminish your feelings for them.

These single parent dating tips won’t guarantee completely smooth sailing, but it will make the process less confusing for everyone concerned.

About the Author:

Kevin Urban is the publisher of Dating-Site-Advisor.com, the single's Internet guide to the best online dating web sites. Get started in the world of online dating with reviews that include Jewish Dating Services and free matchmaking services.

Copyright 2006 Dating-Site-Advisor.com

By Kevin Urban
Published: 7/1/2006

Unique Dating Ideas!

When we think of dates, we often think of expensive restaurants and movie theatres. - But why go someplace expensive and cliche when you can find unique, fun, and romantic dating ideas and places to go for prices that are easy on your wallet?
When most people think of going out on a date, their initial thoughts should never be, "How am I going to pay for this?" Dating should be fun and relaxed. – A time where you should be getting to know your partner and growing closer to them. So many people seem to think of dating as going out to expensive restaurants, plays and theatres, when in reality, there are plenty of wonderfully fun date ideas you can do on a small budget as well. So fortunately, if you don’t have a lot of money to put into your dates, you can still show that special someone an absolutely wonderful time with these great, (And cheap!) dating ideas!

For starters, there’s one twist on an old classic that requires only a nice day to go outside, some food, paper, and a pen or pencil. People have gone on romantic picnics for as long as anyone can remember, but unless you happen to live near some truly beautiful scenery, once the food is done, there isn’t really room left for much more. This isn’t necessary, as you can fill that time with smiles and laughs, and walk away some truly memorable art. To do this, simply take your paper and pencil with you, and once you’ve finished eating, take turns drawing each other. You can begin by unleashing all of your artistic talent, and then later relax a bit for a more comedic variation of reality by editing the surrounding scenery and adding word-balloons to your priceless art. These may never wind up in a museum, but if you keep them in a safe place, finding them later will bring back a rush of fond memories.

Every town has its more historic areas. – Places with old, beautiful homes, ancient churches, battlefields, and even a good haunt or two! Delving into the history of your local buildings can be fascinating, and it may surprise you to learn that a lot of little treasures like these hold tours! There’s nothing more romantic than strolling through an old, southern plantation home or a brilliant garden, and surprisingly, a lot of these tours are small, local and cheap! – I don’t often see one over $5-8 a person. Search around online or in your local paper and plan a date. You can even bring along a camera and get some shots of you and your honey in these fascinating places!

Movies are wonderful for a low-key romantic evening, but Mad Lib Movie Night is an exciting twist on this long-time favorite. All you’ll need is the perfect movie, which is usually going to be a cheesy romance movie, B-grade science fiction flick, or best, a previously recorded soap opera. Pop it in the player, and have each person their own notepad and paper. Here’s how it works: each person has assigned to them one of the most major characters in the film. Place the movie on mute, and play through the first five minutes of the movie, noting when each character has lines. Each person has to write down their own improvised lines for what their assigned character could be saying, and when you get to the end of the first five minutes, rewind back to the start, play it again on mute. - But this time have each person read aloud their substituted lines. Use your wit, and come up with funny parodies, but make sure that they have some bearing on the scenario appearing in the film so that each person’s lines mesh on some level with the other. This is a great way to get in-sync with your partner, as you’ll soon learn their own personal brand of humor, and learn to anticipate what lines they’ll write.

Thrift stores aren’t ever thought of when two people brainstorm over a date location, but they can actually hold a wonderful time for two slightly adventurous daters. Thrift stores are home to all forms of treasures, and all of them are priced so that anyone can afford them! Take your special someone to a local store, and when you get inside, split up, making sure to avoid each other. Once you’ve separated, search all over the place for a small gift that would be perfect for them – ideally something that will make them laugh, or is just plain romantic and sweet. It can be challenging, but you’ll have a lot of fun on your mission, and once you’ve found it, purchase the inexpensive present. When both of you are finished, exchange them with one another!

Finally, find a night that you and your date can get together and make a meal! Fish out an old recipe and try to prepare it together, making sure to use ingredients that aren’t expensive! You can make anything. – From a hot entrée to a sweet, yummy dessert to a zesty salad! Be adventurous; add your own spices and flavorings to the recipe. – If it comes out bad, laugh and make the most of it. Decorate it, whatever you want! But hopefully once you’re done, you’ll have a wonderful meal that you two made together! You can even have "theme" nights, like Mexican night, or healthy night, or even "unhealthy night" where you fry up all your food and add extra salt! Just have fun together!

A date that is truly romantic and noteworthy does not have to be spent at a five-star restaurant or an expensive theatre. – No, oftentimes, the most happy and wonderful of memories come from the goofy little moments you two spend together that are just plain fun! Making sure you’re spending quality time together having fun and getting to know each other is far more important than how much money you spend. So think up some fun and unique ideas and go out there and have fun together!
Buy Goji Juice
Buy Goji Juice and learn what all the fuss is about!

By Cole Carson
Published: 12/7/2007

Great Date Ideas


Taking someone for a date? But again a big question...Where should I take my date? You have come to right place. Read on to find out some great date ideas which can help you to add some romance in your life.
Many guys think they have to spring for fancy dinners or entertainment to impress a woman, but it's always best to keep the first date short, casual and low-key. You want to get to know her, not pay for her attention.

To decide a place to meet is very important. A good plan is to meet at a coffee shop, lunch place, or quiet bar. Find a place where the two of you can have a conversation to see if any sparks fly. This is the perfect opportunity to make use of your dating skills so here are some points worth noting. Keep your focus on her, and try not using sexually-interested body language.

It's important to keep the first date short. Remember; you're busy, not desperate. So end the date early, even if it's going well.

Here are some great Date Ideas

You can go to a playground that's not in use and play. Also you can take along a picnic lunch, baseball, bat or some outdoor toys. Have a great lunch after playtime.

Take your date to an art museum or art gallery or art festival. Get together huge sheets of paper and pens, or charcoal, or crayons or watercolors. After, return home (or go to a park with a picnic table or other location) and create your own artwork to mark a romantic memory

Its spring! Then a botanical garden, arboretum or a community garden can be a great place to visit, especially in the spring. Take a camera, snap pictures of each other frolicking through the foliage.

You can go for local, small theaters, not just movies every time. Sometimes the plays are excellent and some are just plain entertaining.

If your date is interested then check out your local museums - there are history museums or nature museums or aeronautical or sports museums tucked away in an area near you.
You can pick one era upon which to concentrate while you're at the museum. Then find a video or movie set in the same time-frame to watch after your museum tour.

Flowers have always been an important part of any romantic situation. A guy can give his girl flowers or he can send her a bouquet that reminds her of date.

Here are some other points worth to be noted.

Be careful for surprises. Try to avoid surprises like a hatchet movie, meal, etc. on the first date. Your date may be allergic to horror films - and you don't want to 'surprise' a vegetarian with a dinner of beef.

As the saying goes, respect time so time will respect you, be on time. Lateness is inconsiderate It reveals all sorts of things about your personality such as your passive-aggressive tendencies. If your date is late, be pleasant, and listen to their reason - it might be genuine.

If your date compliments you don't just brush it off or say something rude about yourself, say thank you and do not put yourself down.

Conversation is very important. It can be seen that most of the times people don't have any topic to speak on. If you're concerned about topics of conversation, be sure to read a newspaper or watch a news program that day so you're up on world events.

By Dhananjay Kulkarni
Published: 8/8/2004

{Obama or Clinton }Screwed Up Dating Relationship

Dating Relationship Tip: Don't Let Obama or Clinton Screw Up Your Dating Relationship

You like Hillary but your date likes Obama. Nothing wrong with that. A difference of opinon when it comes to politics can lead to some very interesting discussions. However be careful. A subject this passionate can easily spin out of control.
You consider it nothing less than a minor miracle that you are still in this particular dating relationship. Yes you both really like each other and on many topics the two of you are in agreement or at least capable of understanding the other person's point of view. At times you even get the crazy idea that there is no obstacle either of you cannot overcome on your way to building a deep long lasting relationship.

Tonight however was not one of those times. The evening started out pretty good but somewhere between the end of the movie and saying goodnight, you got into a doozy of an argument with your date. What is about commitment, relatives, friends or the quality of the movie? The answer is none of the above. It was all about politics. Again.

There has never been a time when politics was not a hot button issue. For whatever reason, it arouses the passion and fire in people like few subjects can. That zeal seems to have reached a new level of intensity with the world we live in today. Talk radio, cable news, blogging and political forums combined with an exciting race for the Presidency seem to have elevated politics to center stage almost twenty four hours a day.

And lets face it some people love it. Whether it's an exchange of ideas, staying informed or just the thrill of a good argument, many people (including you) gravitate to this subject without any hesitation.

Is it okay in a relationship? Sure. All you have to do is look no further than James Carville and Mary Matlin to see diametrically opposite political views living under one roof.

But no matter how the both of you feel about politics, constant arguing can get old especially when it seeps into additional areas of your relationship. Neither one of you is willing to give up your political convictions but do yourself a favor and set some ground rules.

1. The Agree to Disagree

In many cases it does not matter what you say or what evidence you present, the other person is not going to budge. That's fine except the fact that they are entitled to their opinion and move on. Sometimes people believe if they say it long enough the other person will see the error of their ways. Well guess what? They are probably thinking along the same lines. Agree to disagree and let it go.

2. Listen

One of the things about political discussion is people cannot wait to give their opinion without taking in fully what the other person is saying. Not listening can lead to greater misunderstanding and more unnecessary arguing. You may want to hurry up and give your judgment concerning the last point your date commented on but take a step back and keep your ears open. You may find what they said was not only correct but that you agree with them.

3. Respect

No matter the dynamics of the discussion you should convey to your date that you are not trying to belittle them in anyway. Disrespect will only cause them to harden their point of view. Thank them for trusting you enough to share their opinion on a subject that they feel passionate about. Let them know that political debate is only a small fraction of why you are in this relationship.

4. Humor

Let's be honest. There has never been and will never be a perfect politician. They are some of the most peculiar and flawed individuals that you will ever meet. Have some humor at their expense. That does not mean always making fun of the other person's political heroes; do not be afraid to laugh at the ones on you hold dear. As the great humorist Will Rogers said, "People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke." As you can see not much has changed since Rogers' time.

In a dating relationship, it maybe better to avoid politics altogether but neither one of you wants to. You both like it and feel very strongly. That is okay as long as you put some ground rules in place. Agree to disagree, listen, respect the other person and have a sense of humor about it. Many couples despite having radically different views on a subject continue to enjoy a strong healthy relationship. There is no reason why you cannot do the same when it comes to politics.

Article written by Daryl Campbell. Barack and Hillary would agree that politics is a passionate subject. If handled right it can definitely spice up a relationship. This requires among other things good communication and the willingness to give so you can get. Find out more at The Relationship Tip

By Daryl Campbell
Published: 4/5/2008

DATING TIPS

Tips on How to Pick Up Women

I am going reveal some tips on How to Pick up Women when you are at a bar or a club. You see a woman you'd like to know better. What do you do? Well, try being bold, open and happy for starters. Women like guys who show a smile and even more than this, women like a guy who can laugh at himself and who can crack good jokes
"Your mindset and playful attitude is the key"

First time when I stepped into dating game I used to think that being successful with women I had to master technique. I memorized pick up lines and acted so "cool". Those 3 steps I was aware of helped me a little but suddenly i picked up on more women when I had no agenda. I mean when I went out with my friends to have fun, I have actually picked up more women. For a long long time I was figuring this one out why?

Experience is golden. After months of picking up, approaching and dating women experience has taught me that the most important thing is your playful mindset. What exactly do I mean by "playful mindset" anyway? Lets take a look at it in this way. Having the right attitude is the key. Women love men who are funny, smiling and know how to crack a good joke. Remember a rule number one when you pick up women: "It is not how much you like her, but its how much she likes you!"

This is happening very often. A man will approach a woman,start conversation and she doesn't respond the way he expected her to. And then he walks away and a load of negative thoughts boiling in his head. This will keep him from making another approach.

This is not a good place to be in. So what I am trying to say is do not let those negative experiences put you down, walk straight and became master of your thoughts. If you can not get over these irrational emotional feelings, it will be very difficult to master the game of picking up women.

As I mentioned before the key to mastering the game is to have the right playful mindset. If you're really shy guy, by the way I used to be shy as well, then start off by going out no less than 3 times during your first week and meeting women's eyes longer than you normally would. When your second week comes say "hello" or "hi" to one woman a day that you do not know. Your third week you shall double or triple that number. By your fourth week you should start making at least one approach per day. And so on until you get used to it on daily basic.

Its possible that thought of approaching a woman you do not know scares you, then do not worry and try this. Don't take it personally simply just have fun. Imagine that you are playing your favorite computer game. I know what you are thinking now but I'm not kidding, this really works. Look at it in this way, going out and talking to women isn't reality. Think about it, she doesn't know who you are and you do not know who she is. You are only approaching her.She is going to respond to you based on how she feels at that moment, how you look like, and what you say and how you say it. So it's not reality. It's only a very small echo of it. So when you go out to meet new women, don't take anything personally. It's all about having fun, learning, and trying to make women laugh.

There is a secret to becoming successful as pick up women artist and its to act like you deserve to be one. Show a pride in yourself, your surroundings and your achievements and any woman will be impressed and proud to be seen on your arms.

Would you like to learn MORE tips and tricks How to pick up women? Check out this amazing guide to approaching and attracting women from a woman's point of view.

By Roma Landa
Published: 7/11/2008

Love and Dating Tips

For Single Moms - Can You Really Do It?

As a single mother, you know there are some common questions about dating for single moms. Here we discuss two of the most popular questions that people wonder about...
As a single mom, you may be looking for dating tips because you'd like to enter the dating scene and find love, but you might not be sure about it.

You might ask yourself if it's right as a mother to date, or even if you think it is fine, can you have any good success with it and find a great man?

OK, let's discuss these questions one by one...

Question #1: Is this really right for a single mom to date?

The short answer is: Yes, absolutely!

It's true that you are a mother and have responsibilities for your kids. But you are still a woman with a heart that wants to "love" and "feel loved".

So why not go for what your heart desires and deserves?

Yes, there are some people who still seem to have problem accepting and respecting single mothers who date. They might tell you it's selfish or ask "what about your children?"

But being a mother doesn't have any conflicts with going out there, having fun, and meeting new men. Single moms CAN date, kiss, and even have sex.

So don't pay attention to what other people might think. You know how much you love your kids and what a great mother you are.

Question #2: Is it really possible for you to have success with dating?

Can single mothers have any good success with dating, finding a great man and building a great relationship?

Again, the answer is, absolutely yes!

There are just some things that you need to learn first...

First of all, it's necessary that you find out who you are and what you want out of your life. Find your inner goals and dreams and make a plan to go for them.

Then, not only you will become more happy and fulfilled in your life, but you will also attract much better men who have a great personality and know what they want in their life too.

Another important tip to increase your success in the dating scene, is to educate yourself about dating tips. For example, here you can learn learn 5 important dating tips for single moms.

You can also search for general "dating tips" in Google because when it comes to love and dating, it's a universal art and the rules are almost the same for all ages and people.

For example, it's important that you learn how to have a successful first date by asking the right first date questions.

Because your first date can really make or break your relationship, so it's important that you have a good conversation by asking the right and smart questions.

Also questions will help you learn that person better and decide if he is the kind of person you want.

Wish you much success with your dates!

About the Author:

Ladan Lashkari is giving away a FREE collection of powerful dating tips and articles that will help you win more dates and become highly successful in your relationships. To grab your copy of these tips, drop by http://www.LovePoemsWorld.com while they are still available.

By Ladan Lashkari
Published: 12/11/2006

Dateworthy?

Dateworthy

Get the Relationship You Want: "It's not you . . . it's me."
Ever heard that -- or said that -- before? Sure you have. After all, isn't it the easiest way to step away from a relationship with no one getting hurt?
By Dennie Hughes

Published by Rodale

November 2004; $14.95US/$21.95CAN; 1-59486-075-0

"It's not you . . . it's me."

Ever heard that -- or said that -- before? Sure you have. After all, isn't it the easiest way to step away from a relationship with no one getting hurt?

But the problem with this "get out of relationship free" card is that whether you've dealt it -- or had to deal with it -- it leaves you wondering if it was a feeling-sparing bluff . . . or if it actually is you who needs a better, more Dateworthy hand.

Let's face it. Before you can recognize someone who's Dateworthy you need to become Dateworthy yourself. And that's where Dennie Hughes steps in. With her expert advice, you'll discover how to resolve your own most-bound-to-be-broken-up-with behaviors and how to recognize what makes a guy good, bad, or salvageable.

And, if down the road someone does say, "It's not you . . . it's me," you'll completely agree!

Author

Dennie Hughes USA Weekend magazine's contributing editor and RelationTips writer is an award-winning columnist who has built a career dispensing personal advice with professional expertise. She also hosts a weekly relationship chat on USAToday.com and provides dating expertise for the popular online dating site Match.com.

Dennie, an ovarian cancer survivor, lives in New York City with her very tall husband and very small dog.

Excerpt

The following is an excerpt from the book Dateworthy: Get the Relationship You Want

by Dennie Hughes


Published by Rodale; November 2004; $14.95US/$21.95CAN; 1-59486-075-0

Copyright © 2004 Dennie Hughes

Chapter 12

Great Dates


You know what I love about dating shows?

The producers, in an effort to make good TV, rack their brains to come up with really fun and interesting ways for a couple to interact.

Forget just meeting for coffee or a meal. They have them learn how to polka. Go to a ceramics class and make personalized mugs. Dog walking for charity. All terrific Great Date Dos. Sure, all their good intentions get shot to hell later on with the prerequisite drunken-hot-tub thing, but I think those first fifteen minutes are pure inspiration!

If you want your own Great Date Production, it's going to be up to you to do a little behind-the-scenes producing and planning to make the magic happen. (Minus the martinis and bikinis, of course, unless that's your idea of a worthy dating experience . . . if so, get thee back to chapter 1!)

Oh sure, in a perfect world, the big dating scene will go like this: Guy calls, has two exciting plans for you to choose from, and executes the details perfectly. The female lead's only responsibility is to look cute, provide fabulous conversation, sit back, and enjoy the ride.

Cut! Not as in "cut and print." As in cut that out!

Haven't you learned by now that anything Dateworthy -- including the actual date itself -- is all about what you put into it? You may not get perfect, but if you want a production that's at the least fun, memorable, and has the possibility of a sequel, then it's up to you to help direct this date.

So, with Oscar in mind (the award, silly, not some guy!), here are some ideas to get you pumped about your Great Date Production.

Where to Go

Oh, sure, everyone knows the rule: Whoever does the asking out should have an idea of what to do. (They are also "expected" to pay, but very often, men will insist on footing the bill or at least allow you to just leave the tip. Either way, you should be prepared with extra dough on top of your emergency twenties if you do the asking.)

Do you have a clue what you'll say when you make the call?

Wait . . . did you just say you never do the asking?

Oh, no you didn't. Because you know being Dateworthy means taking the fullest advantage of fate date moments when you may have to get the ball rolling!

So I ask again: What will you say when you make the call? And, on the what-I'm-sure-would-be-preferable flip side, what if he calls you and asks, "What would you like to do?"

Personally, I think the ideal comeback in that instance would be: "I'll tell you what: Why don't you tell me what you were thinking, and I'll tell you what I was thinking, and we'll see which one is the favorite?" That way, you'll see whether he really wants to hear what you think . . . or he's just a man who didn't care enough about the date to make a plan. If he says, "I don't know. . ." you should say, "Know what? I really want you to have an idea of what you want to do to, so . . . think about it and call me back!" Click. Talk about a challenge. You didn't just throw down the gauntlet -- you smacked him upside the head with it.

If it's the former -- that he did have a plan, but wanted to hear your ideas -- then you should be prepared to respond with an activity that includes at least some of the following:

It promotes conversation. That means, no movies or loud concerts or anything that keeps you both from talking to each other.

It's wallet-favorable. The last thing anyone needs is to blow the bank on a first date. It's unfair to whoever is paying, and, from what I've read in reader letters, it's a huge source of discomfort to women who often feel "obligated" to "pay" for their meals with sex.

It's male friendly. Unless he brings up dancing or a flower show, save that for a later date suggestion. Think in terms of activities that have to do with eating and nothing to do with him tripping or looking stupid or in any way being detrimental to the all-important male ego.

It helps you K.I.S.S. That is, helps you Keep It Short and Simple. If you have a preset time limit ("I'll meet you at four, but I really have to leave at about six"), you can exit a not-so-great date gracefully . . . and leave a great date with anticipation about the next one.

You might also want to consider:

  • Amusement parks. Ride the rides, go to the funhouse, share nutrient-questionable food. It's actually a great place to get him talking about his family and childhood.

  • Cooking classes. No fooling . . . or drooling! Guys love to cook. And eat. And actually have a picture in their heads of what you look like in the kitchen. (He doesn't have to know it's the last time he'll see you in the kitchen . . . just kidding.)

  • "It's not just paintings" museums. Whether it's sports or music or a chocolate exhibit, find something that you both don't have to be incredibly art-knowledgeable to enjoy. Walking around also encourages hand-holding, a bonus for him (remember, he's a two-headed being who's happy to get skin contact).

  • "Old man" sports. Bowling. Playing pool. Golf. Traditionally for old dudes -- now trendy. They're games that are slow-paced with good talking downtime in between, but they're enjoyable to do and encourage fun competition.

  • Brunch. Affordable in even five-star budget-busting restaurants, and it's early enough to . . . have another date later but not too early that you can't still get good sleep after your Saturday night date.


RelationTip: Don't suggest -- or accept a suggestion -- unless it's something you really, truly are interested in doing.

Just remember: included in your "where to go" should also be "where to meet" plans. Bottom line? If he's a fate date or someone you've been corresponding with online, tell him you'll meet him at the venue. If he's a relative or friend fix-up, a former coworker, someone from your church -- anyone where there's already a built-in knowledge of each other and of each other's friends -- it's okay to have him pick you up at your place, but I suggest being ready to go when he gets there so that you can get back into the public space.

And finally, make sure that you both know exactly where and when you're supposed to meet, and that you both know how to get there. If neither of you have an exact address, offer to call the restaurant for the specific information, and then offer to leave it on his machine. The last thing you want is to end up at Famous Johns on Sixth Avenue while he's waiting for you at John's Famous on Sixth Street.

Reprinted from: Dateworthy: Get the Relationship You Want by Dennie Hughes © 2004 by Dennie Hughes. Permission granted by Rodale, Inc., Emmaus, PA 18098. Available wherever books are sold or directly from the publisher by calling (800) 848-4735 or visit their website at www.rodalestore.com.

For more information, please visit Dennie Hughes' Web site, www.denniehughes.com or www.writtenvoices.com.

By Buzzle Staff and Agencies
Published: 10/14/2004

{Obama or Clinton }Screwed Up Dating Relationship

Dating Relationship Tip: Don't Let Obama or Clinton Screw Up Your Dating Relationship

You like Hillary but your date likes Obama. Nothing wrong with that. A difference of opinon when it comes to politics can lead to some very interesting discussions. However be careful. A subject this passionate can easily spin out of control.
You consider it nothing less than a minor miracle that you are still in this particular dating relationship. Yes you both really like each other and on many topics the two of you are in agreement or at least capable of understanding the other person's point of view. At times you even get the crazy idea that there is no obstacle either of you cannot overcome on your way to building a deep long lasting relationship.

Tonight however was not one of those times. The evening started out pretty good but somewhere between the end of the movie and saying goodnight, you got into a doozy of an argument with your date. What is about commitment, relatives, friends or the quality of the movie? The answer is none of the above. It was all about politics. Again.

There has never been a time when politics was not a hot button issue. For whatever reason, it arouses the passion and fire in people like few subjects can. That zeal seems to have reached a new level of intensity with the world we live in today. Talk radio, cable news, blogging and political forums combined with an exciting race for the Presidency seem to have elevated politics to center stage almost twenty four hours a day.

And lets face it some people love it. Whether it's an exchange of ideas, staying informed or just the thrill of a good argument, many people (including you) gravitate to this subject without any hesitation.

Is it okay in a relationship? Sure. All you have to do is look no further than James Carville and Mary Matlin to see diametrically opposite political views living under one roof.

But no matter how the both of you feel about politics, constant arguing can get old especially when it seeps into additional areas of your relationship. Neither one of you is willing to give up your political convictions but do yourself a favor and set some ground rules.

1. The Agree to Disagree

In many cases it does not matter what you say or what evidence you present, the other person is not going to budge. That's fine except the fact that they are entitled to their opinion and move on. Sometimes people believe if they say it long enough the other person will see the error of their ways. Well guess what? They are probably thinking along the same lines. Agree to disagree and let it go.

2. Listen

One of the things about political discussion is people cannot wait to give their opinion without taking in fully what the other person is saying. Not listening can lead to greater misunderstanding and more unnecessary arguing. You may want to hurry up and give your judgment concerning the last point your date commented on but take a step back and keep your ears open. You may find what they said was not only correct but that you agree with them.

3. Respect

No matter the dynamics of the discussion you should convey to your date that you are not trying to belittle them in anyway. Disrespect will only cause them to harden their point of view. Thank them for trusting you enough to share their opinion on a subject that they feel passionate about. Let them know that political debate is only a small fraction of why you are in this relationship.

4. Humor

Let's be honest. There has never been and will never be a perfect politician. They are some of the most peculiar and flawed individuals that you will ever meet. Have some humor at their expense. That does not mean always making fun of the other person's political heroes; do not be afraid to laugh at the ones on you hold dear. As the great humorist Will Rogers said, "People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke." As you can see not much has changed since Rogers' time.

In a dating relationship, it maybe better to avoid politics altogether but neither one of you wants to. You both like it and feel very strongly. That is okay as long as you put some ground rules in place. Agree to disagree, listen, respect the other person and have a sense of humor about it. Many couples despite having radically different views on a subject continue to enjoy a strong healthy relationship. There is no reason why you cannot do the same when it comes to politics.

Article written by Daryl Campbell. Barack and Hillary would agree that politics is a passionate subject. If handled right it can definitely spice up a relationship. This requires among other things good communication and the willingness to give so you can get. Find out more at The Relationship Tip

By Daryl Campbell
Published: 4/5/2008

Eight Great Dating Tips

For Men

If you keep these seven dating tips for men in mind, you’ll be successful in dating as many, or as few, women as you want to. And if you continue to follow them, you’re much more likely to win the woman of your dreams.
Dating tips for men wouldn’t seem like something you have to read about in an article; after all, you can ask your buddies for their advice, right? But perhaps that’s why so many of your buddies are still single. These days it seems like the rules of dating have become so complicated that the basics have been forgotten. To make it a little bit easier, here are some basic dating tips for men that are guaranteed to make things easier – and they’re back to basics rules that every woman will appreciate.

Make Eye Contact

So many men today forget that conversation isn’t just about words. Women put a high value on communication that goes beyond words, and if you focus on impressing, talking and showing yourself in the best light, you may not be focusing on her. Eye contact assures her that she has your undivided attention – something every woman wants on a date. It reassures her that the night is about her and her alone.

Remember to Ask Questions and Listen to Her Answers

Yes, you want her to get to know you. You’ll have plenty of opportunity to let her get to know you if you get to know her on those first few dates. You should certainly answer her questions and give input to the conversation, but make sure you ask her about what she likes and what she’s interested in. Don’t forget to get her opinion rather than just giving yours – and if you disagree on a particular subject, that’s fine. Debating an interesting topic in a relaxed manner will show you’re intelligent and that you respect her opinion. For Pete’s sake, don’t insist on changing her mind – respect her independence.

Be Yourself

This sounds so simplistic, but I’m astounded by the number of men who try show off how successful and important they are by inflating their job titles, salary, etc. early on in a relationship. Do you really want to get caught in this type of charade weeks or even months down the line? If she’s really the one for you, she’ll respect what you do and who you are. Far better to find out now than later. Especially if you really have it for the girl later, and she dumps you for being deceitful. If you remember any dating tips for men, this is the absolute most important.

Flowers on the First Date?

Save the flowers and grand gestures for after the first few dates. This is one of those dating tips for men that may come as a shock to a lot of you, but flowers on the very first date isn’t nearly as impressive as flowers or some other gift a few dates down the line. On the first date, a woman will assume you bring flowers to every first date, so it’s a relatively empty gesture. Gallant, but not triggered by your feelings for her. On your third or fourth date, she’ll be wowed by a small gift or bouquet. Why? Because you’ve taken the time and thought to bring her something after you’ve already known she’ll go out with you. It means the gesture is heart-felt – it’s all about the way she makes you feel.

Keep it Casual

Another dating tip for a single man that’s often overlooked is to keep it casual. You don’t have to make the first date the most impressive and romantic in the world. After all, it’s difficult to go up if you start at the top – what will you do for an encore on an anniversary or special occasion? Instead, go out for coffee or drinks on the first date. If you definitely want it to be dinner, suggest someplace nice but casual, not the Ritz. You’ll both be more comfortable when you aren’t worrying about which fork to use or how to address the wine steward. Choose a place that’s comfortable and not too loud so that you can linger and talk as long as you’d like.

Should You Talk about Work?

Avoid talking about work too much. Always remember this dating tip for men: Naturally a woman wants to know what you do, and you should give her a brief sketch. But until you know a woman really well, don’t give a long dissertation on the last deal you landed. You’ll either sound like you’re bragging or she’ll think you’re obsessed with your job. Neither image is appealing.

Show Up on Time

Don’t ever, ever keep a woman waiting on you – it doesn’t build anticipation. It makes you appear inconsiderate and self-centered. If something happens and you can’t avoid running late, be sure to call ahead and apologize and let her know so that she isn’t sitting at home stewing.

Call When You Say You Will

(Here’s an online dating tip for men: The same applies to logging on – if you have plans to "meet" by Instant Message – be there.) No woman ever wants to feel like she was humored and then brushed off. If you say you will call next week, call next week. Not the week after, or the next month. When you do that, it screams, "I was keeping you on the back burner just in case nothing better came along." If you aren’t interested in another date, don’t promise anything. Simply say, "I had a nice time. Good night." Promising something you have no intention of following through on is guaranteed to hit the female grapevine, and your name will be Mudd.

If you keep these seven dating tips for men in mind, you’ll be successful in dating as many, or as few, women as you want to. And if you continue to follow them, you’re much more likely to win the woman of your dreams.

About the Author:

Kevin Urban is the editor at Dating-Site-Advisor.com, a popular consumer guide to the best online dating sites. He offers detailed reviews on free online dating services and gives free dating advice for single men.

Copyright 2006 Dating-Site-Advisor.com

By Kevin Urban
Published: 6/22/2006

Dating Tips:

You Can Get The Kind Of Women You Have Always Wanted

In this dating secrets article, I will teach you some tips and tricks to spice up the effectiveness of your first few dates with women and score better.

Guys who have lower self confidence when it comes to women like to think that they don't "deserve" to get the kind of women they want deeply inside. Well, if you belong to this group I have good news for you. Just keep reading!

I usually put women into 3 categories: in the first there are ugly or average looking girls. In the second category there are girls with "supermodel" looks. And I named the last category, "girls you really like". The first needs no explanation. The second category changes by time and fashion: currently, it's girls who are 180cm tall, who weigh 50kg and who have mostly blonde hair and a certain type of face. When we talk about "hot girls" we like to talk about girls in this category. But what about the third?

Have you noticed that there are certain women you have "a thing" for? These girls don't resemble the actual trend in supermodels. At least not in 100%. They are taller or shorter. They might have a bigger nose or smaller lips. They might not have the biggest boobs. But there is one thing in common: you will have a "fetish" for these girls. A little thing or feature on their body, which attracts you like a magnet.

Let's see my case as an example. I love shorter (but slim) girls who have a very fragile body-type. Are these girls 180cm tall as the current trend in supermodels dictates? No. I also love girls with exotic faces or certain exotic features on their faces. Do these girls have a baby face like supermodels should? No. Do I still like these girls? Of course! If I am with a girl like this, am I getting the kind of women I want? Of course!

I'll share a secret you will like: Oftentimes, these unique types of girls you find attractive will find your type attractive as well! When I was younger and less successful with women, I have noticed getting signs of interest from these girls I had a thing for. Later I realized that it was somehow made to be this way: I respond to their looks and they respond to mine. As I talked to many guys since then, I had to realize that I am not alone: most of the guys experience this! I don't know if there is a logical reason behind this phenomenon, but it's not important at all. What matters is that you can attract the kind of women you have a thing for damn easily!

I don't say you should restrain yourself from going for supermodels. But do not let the trends dictate which kind of girls you should date and which kind you shouldn't. The above is the type of women, which could give you a lot of joy and happiness.

Finally, if you want to know how to seduce the kind of women you want, there is an e-book I've written. You have to know each step of the seduction process, from understanding the way women think, to learning to be a Man who attracts girls with his presence, approaching women the right way, secrets of making your dates successful and effective, improving your sexual life and a lot, lot more... Whether you are ugly, bald, young, old or broke, the techniques I teach will work for you like charm!
Seduction And Dating Dot Com
Seduction and dating tips

By Giuseppe Notte
Published: 9/28/2005

Dating Spot


Dating is a process that gives one enough time to find out as much as possible about a person. But without the right dating spot, you’ll probably end up far from what you dreamt the date would be like. Great food in the nicest restaurant is one ideal way to spend a romantic evening. When choosing a restaurant for your date, remember you are looking for romance, excitement and passion.

Find the perfect place to feed your appetite for romance, great cuisine and add up to time well-spent. But be sure to check out a place that has just the right romantic ambience to leave your sweet talk undisturbed with a delightful mix of fine dining, low lighting and some smooth music to spice things up a bit. Be assured searching the right restaurant (if that’s your dating spot) is no more a problem.

Get to know the preferences and the favorite dishes of your date. Giving an added thought to research the preferences will go a long way towards winning your date’s affections. You know it would be a bad idea to treat your special someone a Mexican delicacy, while it’s the sushi that he/she drools for. Always choose food that’s easy to eat and avoid struggling with lobsters - never forget you are on a date and not out there to explore delicacies.

But how do you come up with the perfect restaurant – that offers good service, good food, perfect ambience, great memories and lots of romance? Search online for great listings of romantic restaurants. Restaurant search engines like BooRah are one such web space that aggregates millions of online reviews and transforms them into easily understandable summaries and in-depth ratings that enables consumers to see all restaurant recommendations and information in one place – easily connecting people to the restaurants they most desire and helping them discover romantic places to try.

Search for restaurants that are not crowded or have plenty of distractions, it’s got to be a quiet place. Of course, a candle-lit dinner has always been romantic. If you both are into dancing, choose a restaurant that has a dance floor with a live band that plays soft music, classy tunes and romantic melodies. Prefer soft music as it gives scope to whisper the sweet nothings in each other’s ears.

To make your date a memorable one, choosing the right place is a step ahead in the direction of making it a romantic evening. Use a restaurant guide to pick out a place that best suits your temperament and reflects you true self. Never pretend to like a Sushi restaurant, just because your date does. Discover your love with great food in the perfect ambiance.

By ajax z
Published: 4/5/2008

How To Ask a Girl/Guy Out On a Date?

How To Ask a Girl/Guy Out On a Date

Dating tips and advice on how to ask someone out on a date, ways to ask a girl out or how to get a guy to ask you out.
How To Ask a Girl/Guy Out On a Date
How to ask him/her out
Though this might not be a problem with some but it might pose to be a big problem for many. There is an easy way to do this without it being tough on you or the other person. Follow the following tips.

Don't just offer a generic invitation
'Want to go out with me sometime?' Of course the both of you wanna go out. After all who doesn’t get fed up of monotony! Try avoiding such Rhetorical questions! It makes it really hard for someone to say no. Which you might think is a good thing--but it's not. It sets you up for an evening with someone who doesn't want to be there, who's kicking themselves for not having figured out a way to say no nicely and who might have actually been psyched to date you if only you'd gotten to know them a little first without all the pressure. Thus DO NOT presume that the other person wants to go out with you. It might just be the other way around hence don't create an awkward situation for you and of course for the other person.

Always ask someone out for a specific thing.
Make it easy on yourself also by making the rendezvous in such a way that you were going to do it anyways. After all natural mannerism always works. Probably because we have seen so many clichés in the world that its only natural for human beings to feel a lot more comfortable to get natural. Like inviting him/her to your house warming party or B'day party or any other party. Another suggestion would be to put all your cards on the table.

Its best if you draw clarity visions before you get to unduly assumptions. Its better to make the most of the situation or else, you might land up making up one. Another good method of invitation would be to invite him/her to some get-together or picnic. This has two benefits; first, you won't be a nervous wreck asking someone out this way. After all you could be asking them to come along out of friendship. Second, they can say yes, or they can say, 'Sorry, I already have plans, without it being a whole issue. This way you will ensure that you are not embarrassed and also make you know the person a bit more.

Speaking a bit more on this, although it might feel awkward at first to speak to him/her in a crowded place so your initial jitters are also done away with and once you both get used to the noise outside, it would at least help you to get to a more silent zone. Most of the times these zones a re wee bit far away from where you exactly are. So while moving to another seat that time could be utilized to gauge the other’s personality, make yourself a lot more comfortable and also reduce the overall anxiety.

Remember never ask more than once. If the person says no, they say and mean a ‘no’! (Unless they made it clear that they genuinely had a previous commitment and would have been otherwise interested: 'Wow, I love watching Brad Pitt movie and want to be first on your list the next time you get tickets.') All and all remember given any situation and given any amount of enthusiasm, just go ahead with it, with a firm head on your shoulders. Although this may sound like rocket science at the time of asking, with butterflies roaming around in your stomach; go ahead with some sort of balance.

By Prerna Salla
Published: 2/13/2005

Dating Relationship: Are You Looking For A Compliment?

on line dating solutions...

There are certain dating rituals that we take for granted. One in particular doesn't seem like a big deal but if forgotten, it can put a cloud over the entire relationship.
The mirror sure is kind to you. You put maximum effort into sprucing yourself up for the date and it looks like it has paid off big time. You look so good you can hardly stand it. No doubt when your dating partner sees you they are going to be floored.

And here they are now. They apologize for being slightly late but are ready to go out and have good time. The conversation sparkles but isn't that always when it comes to the two of you? You catch a reflection of yourself from time to time and it appears like you look better now than you did when you left the house. How is that possible? Oh well you tell yourself some people have got it, some don't. You've got enough of it to fill three cargo ships.

But as the evening wears on your mood has changed considerably. Your date asks you what's wrong. You say "nothing" in a way that implies something is not right. By the time the date is over you are in the foulest of moods. As you and your date say goodnight they again ask you what's wrong. You again give the same answer. After assessing the evening you are not to sure you want to continue with the relationship.

You were looking for something from your date that they failed to provide. Now your ego is bruised. You wanted a compliment. After all you did spend considerable time getting yourself ready and if your date was too dense to notice may be it's time to find someone new.

Slow down. Now ask yourself why you went out with this person originally. Was it because they were always throwing bouquets at your feet or telling you how wonderful you look? If those were the reasons then this relationship was in trouble from the start.

No doubt when we look good we want our date to notice but it shouldn't be a gauge that determines your temperament for the rest of the evening. If you want then ask how you look. Once that is out of the way then you can get on with the rest of the date. Besides how are you when it comes to complimenting your date? Do you do it at all or do you only say it so they will reciprocate in kind?

Your appearance should be very important to you or anyone for that matter but do not let your pride get too close to it. The ego is a fragile thing that can easily be wounded. Know that you look good and spend the rest of the time concentrating on making the date special for the both of you.

Article written by Daryl Campbell - The Relationship Tip - If you want your date to end badly then ask one or all three of these questions.

winthemarket.com

By Daryl Campbell
Published: 11/12/2008